I am trying to become a perfectionist. Never before in my life have I made a concerted effort to do anything properly, to the best of my ability, until I was happy with the result. I have always cut corners, refusing to buy the materials I needed, refusing to start over after I'd made a mistake, refusing to learn enough about what I was trying to do, etc.
I have started to try. There have been a few, tiny successes, so tiny that they will make me look foolish: a scarf I made for myself that is really pretty and that I can't wait to wear, my milk-foam skills [I decided that if I was going to be stuck in Starbucks eight hours a day this summer that I might as well learn to make good foam - but it can still be improved], a violin piece I have been working on for months because I want it to sound amazing, mailing my zines off in envelopes so they arrive in nice condition, some banana bread that didn't taste like cardboard, a few drawings I like, the way I set up my new room - only keeping the things I adored or absolutely needed.
I told you. I've made myself look foolish. Most people take these sorts of things for granted as the results of an obvious method.
I have started to try. There have been a few, tiny successes, so tiny that they will make me look foolish: a scarf I made for myself that is really pretty and that I can't wait to wear, my milk-foam skills [I decided that if I was going to be stuck in Starbucks eight hours a day this summer that I might as well learn to make good foam - but it can still be improved], a violin piece I have been working on for months because I want it to sound amazing, mailing my zines off in envelopes so they arrive in nice condition, some banana bread that didn't taste like cardboard, a few drawings I like, the way I set up my new room - only keeping the things I adored or absolutely needed.
I told you. I've made myself look foolish. Most people take these sorts of things for granted as the results of an obvious method.
No comments:
Post a Comment